Social expectations and a free mind

Do not do things because they've always been done so. Go your personal way.

Article pubilshed on 2019/02/17
This post is assigned to the categories: Black and white, People and creative portraits, Profound

Ay Caramba! Como estas, hombre? That’s what a fancy Spanish dude would say.
I presented some vacation impressions to you not long ago. As you know, all my posts have a focus on specific topics. And so shall it be again: In contrast to that rather technical post from Fuerteventura, it should be more about a general life wisdom here.
Since I do not want this to become too monotonous, I have coupled this post with a second, more vibrant one. If you wanna skip the intensive part, let me take ya to Tenerife without no detours.
Yes, we’re going back to the Canaries.
If you don’t feel like reading at all today, then go straight to the appropriate gallery.

Otherwise, let me tell you some things about expectations.

When my wife and I got married, we were confronted with many decisions that had to be made. I’m not telling you anything new here. That’s how weddings go.
But during this time we could learn a lot. The main thing that struck us was how people react to terms generally shaped by society and what expectations they automatically get.
Take the term wedding for an instance. People automatically associate this word with a pompous wedding dress, a multi level wedding cake, a tears stirring opening dance, bridesmaids, a photographer, a DJ and so on and so forth.
But that’s not all, the level of abstraction goes even further: People have an exact idea of what those things should look like in detail. Take the dress as an example: People immediately have a specific picture in mind. This phenomenon applies to all components mentioned.
Ask yourself how you’re supposed to meet that expectation.
No matter what decision you make, you might disappoint someone in some way.
The more people involved, the worse. And so we’ve often caught ourselves justifying to someone why we don’t do something this or that way. This happened even though we’ve always thought freely and in different ways than others. A totally unnecessary process.
But please don’t get me wrong: Our wedding was the most beautiful event in a long time, friends and family were absolutely excited. We are so grateful for the help and love that has been given to both of us. Definitely a wonderful memory.
In retrospect, however, we would do some things differently.
Let’s start by not taking things too seriously and living more in a relaxed way. Life is over faster than you’d think, so you shouldn’t get bogged down or unnecessarily get too deep into little things and details. Above all, you shouldn’t worry all the time. It doesn’t solve problems.
You probably have already wondered how this is related to our vacation in Tenerife? Well, as soon as the wedding was over, we’re about to go on a so-called honeymoon.
I’m sure you can image how people advise here as well: You only go on one honeymoon in your whole life! You can always go on a normal trip. You should spend lots and lots of money here. You should travel further away than this. Pweh.
Believe me. You can always do a big trip, this doesn’t have to be your honeymoon.
In the end of the day our choice, however, was a great hotel in Tenerife.
And this for a specific and at the same time simple reason: We’ve been there once before and we knew it was gonna be great. In this way, we have virtually saved ourselves from further annoying decisions. The real essence of this article is that you should always make your decisions freely and most importantly, use your head and mind.
Don’t do things because they have always exactly been done so. People do so many things without ever questioning them.

The fact that this post was largely about our wedding is due to the circumstance that this made us realize again how much expectations and social standards play a role in modern society.
Work hard at school to get a good job to earn as much money as possible.
What about this one: Don’t take too long! At the latest in your early thirties you have to have children and build a house.
Listen! Do not let others define you. It is absolutely OK to break a pattern once in a while!!
Go your own way in your own personal tempo.

Congratulations on fighting your way through this very profound article! And now check out the second part. You need a balance to this kinda deep contents.